Recently I have been to a few weddings and engagement parties of friends of both Pete and I and it’s really got me thinking about my own relationship with Pete and our future together. We’ve been together now for 5 and a half years, and a lot of my friends have been saying to me that we should be engaged by now, buying a house together, having children! Should we be? Should I be expecting a proposal and to be letting my employers know I’ll be off on maternity leave in the next year? Or should I be happy with my relationship as is it – do you need to get married, have kids and own a house nowadays?
The simple truth – I do want to get married to Pete, and I do want to have children together, and we are hoping to buy a house in the next year. I want all of those things, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that I have to have them, or that other people want them. I have friends that have got married at 22 and bought a house together straight after, and I have friends who have been together over 10 years and aren’t even close to considering getting married, and I have friends that have known each other for six months and are already planning their wedding for next year.
Relationships are funny. I find I’m thinking to myself if it would be different between me and Pete if we were engaged or married, and I don’t think that it would be – which makes me question whether I want to get married to Pete because it will make our relationship stronger, or whether I just want the party. Is that a bad reason to want to get married? When I honestly think about it though, as I’m not religious in the slightest, I want to get married to Pete because I like the idea of making a public declaration that I do love him and I want to make an officially commitment to him for the rest of my life. And I think that’s a pretty good reason to want to get married.
I’m aware that this post has been quite short, but it’s a musing I’ve been having and needed to get off my chest. Let me know how you think marriage, kids and buying a house effects a relationship and whether you think marriage is something that’s important for a relationship to progress.